Cape Town, Expat, wine

Could Beau Constantia be Santa’s Secret Hideaway?

Whether or not Santa spends time here, there are hills to roll down.  What more could you ask for?

Have you ever wondered where Father Christmas goes to recuperate after his mammoth Christmas month?  It could be anywhere really, but I have a theory that it could just possibly be Beau Constantia Vineyard in South Africa.  Here’s why…

1st Clue – The Wine Labels

Just check the wine label – it’s a dead giveaway.  They staff told us that the late Farm Manager was a modest chap and didn’t want to put his name on the label.  That could of course be true, but I can’t help thinking it could be a cover story.

a)  Check out this familiar looking outline of a friendly bearded face.

b)  The range is called Pas de Nom (no name/without name).  Father Christmas would of course need to go incognito, so this is perfect.

Incognito Label

2nd Clue – The Pas de Nom Range

Pas de Nom is available as a red or a white.  Now who else do we know who favours those colours?  Hmmmm.  There is also a Pas de Nom MCC*, which is perfect for all sorts of celebrations…like Christmas. Red, white and Christmas wine.

*MCC stands for Methode Cap Classique.  Basically it’s Champagne, but as it doesn’t come from France’s Champagne region, they can’t call it Champagne, mais non! So the South African vineyards came up with MCC.


3rd Clue – ‘Closed for Christmas’

There is a highly regarded restaurant, Chef’s Warehouse, on site.  It was ‘closed for Christmas’ when we visited (the team was clearly busy on another big project – wink wink).

Happily the all important tasting room and deck were still open for business.    Usually I’m a sucker for trying ALL the wines, but I stuck to the MCC and really enjoyed it.  We bought a couple of bottles to enjoy on Christmas Day.

4th Clue  – Cheeky signage

“Offenders will be prosecuted or executed.”

Somebody with a sense of humour is responsible for the signage around the vineyard.


Surely this can only be the mischievous work of Father Christmas’  naughty elves?

The loo with the view is pretty cool.

Loo with a View at Beau Constantia

It’s not the first loo with a view we’ve encountered in South Africa.  There was the one in the KwaZulu-Natal Midlands that had a very unexpected outlook.


But I digress, time to recap the evidence:

  • Incognito Father Christmas Wine Label
  • Wines available in the big man’s signature colours
  • Restaurant ‘closed’ for Christmas
  • Cheeky signage

I’ll leave it to you to decide.  Regardless of whether or not my theory holds the slightest drop of water (or should that be wine?), Beau Constantia is certainly worth visiting if you are in the Cape Town area.  It’s a bijou, modern vineyard tucked away at the top of Constantia Nek.  The wines are delicious, the views are rather lovely and (according to friends that have eaten there) the restaurant is excellent.

We didn’t taste them, so we can’t comment, but Beau Constantia has also collaborated with Guy Munton Private Artisanal Distiller on a gin and two vodkas, so even if you’re not a great wine lover, this is yet another reason to drop by.

1 thought on “Could Beau Constantia be Santa’s Secret Hideaway?”

  1. Oh my goodness, how brilliantly you’ve conjured up memories of our amazing day with you guys there.

    Love your theory, lucky git if this is true! Can’t really blame him at all. What an utterly gorgeous place.


    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.